


you're here, that's the way it should be

by Daisies_and_Roses



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, Broken Bones, Car Accidents, Character Death, Christmas, F/F, Friendship/Love, Grief/Mourning, Holidays, Hospitalization, Hospitals, Hurt Skye | Daisy Johnson, Major Character Injury, Past Character Death, Possibly Unrequited Love, References to Depression, Unconfessed Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-12-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:40:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27665552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daisies_and_Roses/pseuds/Daisies_and_Roses
Summary: A Christmas holiday off work at SHIELD appeals to everyone, especially when they find it is going to be spent at the May household. But what was supposed to be an innocent celebration turns into the worst day of everyone's lives. TW: Major character death, depressing thoughts, injuries
Relationships: Jemma Simmons & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Jemma Simmons/Skye | Daisy Johnson, Leo Fitz/Jemma Simmons, Melinda May & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Phil Coulson & Skye | Daisy Johnson
Comments: 5
Kudos: 44





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please be careful while reading this. I have no idea what possessed me to write this fic. All I can say is I'm so sorry. This is not your average fluffy Christmas fic.

* * *

It was a cold December evening. Daisy and Jemma were singing their hearts out, driving together toward May's family's house. Because it was a calm season in the whole SHIELD world, Coulson decided to allow the team a Holiday break. Daisy and Jemma had been working diligently on a lead and were the last ones to leave the base. It was nearly Christmas Eve, but they were determined to make it to the May home in time.

It was a rainy night in Arizona, and the roads were just cold enough to get a bit slick. Daisy was driving, only because Jemma needed to finish sewing the ugly sweater she made for May's father as a host gift. When Jemma told Daisy her idea, the Inhuman rolled her eyes and snorted, saying the Mays weren't sentimental people. Jemma brushed it off,

gently punching her friend's arm.

"YOU'RE HERE! THAT'S THE WAY IT SHOULD BE! SNOW IS FALLING AND THE CAROLERS SING!" they sang in unison, joy flooding them. It was almost Christmas.

Daisy had never had a real family Christmas. She'd had a few good foster families, but none of them ever wanted to spend a lot of money on her when the Holidays came around. One year, she was put with a Jewish family, but she knocked over their family heirloom Menorah and broke a piece off, while also scorching a piece of their couch. They were angry at her but thankfully didn't send her back until the planned time. Daisy had just felt guilty and never wanted to mess up anyone's Holiday again.

Giggling as "Underneath the Tree" ended, Daisy looked down at the radio and turned it down a bit, smiling. "I wonder what Mr. May is gonna cook for us."

Jemma shrugged, cursing a bit when she poked herself with the sewing needle. "Who knows. Melinda tells me he's a good cook, so I'm gonna take her word for it, even if she gave me literally no specifics."

Daisy smiled even wider, sighing as she smiled over at Jemma. She'd never said it before, but the biochemist really was her soulmate. They'd been best friends since the day they met, and they'd helped each other get through the horrors of being SHIELD agents throughout the years. Daisy loved her, but through all these years, it killed her to not be able to distinguish whether she had a platonic or romantic love for Jemma. It was always at the back of her mind, and it seemed to hoist itself forward when Jemma was in her presence. Her smile, her beautiful hair, her gentle, loving heart...Of course, Daisy felt eternally guilty. _Fitz_ was Jemma's soulmate, not her. She felt selfish, but her damn heart forced her to love this woman. She knew this feeling would never fade. She'd just learned to accept it.

"Daisy," Jemma said calmly.

"Hm?" the Inhuman asked, not taking her eyes off Jemma. She'd averted them to the sweater in the doctor's hands, focusing on the delicate movements as precise as her sutures.

Simmons pointed through the windshield. "I think I see some snowdrifts or ice coming up."

Daisy furrowed her brow, looking back at the road. "That's odd for Arizona-"

Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, Daisy felt the car swerving, out of her control. The ice must have slipped under the wheels and she started swerving off into the center of the road. Jemma was yelling something but Daisy was too focused on trying to get back into the correct lane.

It was too late.

The last thing Daisy saw was blinding headlights in her direct line of sight. A deafening crash. Then nothing.

* * *

When Daisy opened her eyes, she was on the side of the road. It was still dark out, but she was lying on her back on the grass right next to the pavement. A man was knelt over her, his expression concerned and guilty. Another man was standing next to him, his phone's flashlight on as he shined it on Daisy so they could see. Behind them was a battered-up maintenance van and she saw her own car smashed completely. It was too dark to see inside of it.

"Hey, you alright?" asked the crouched man. He knitted his eyebrows. "I'm so sorry, you all were swerving too fast from that patch of ice and I- I tried to stop. I'm so, so sorry. I'm so sorry."

"I-" Daisy started. She began to panic because she couldn't get a breath in. Her chest hurt and her leg and her arm and- "Jem," she croaked, trying to sit up and find her best friend.

"Hey, woah," the man said, gently pushing her shoulders down. "The ambulance is on the way. They told me to get you out of the car and make sure you didn't move, if possible."

"Jem," she repeated.

"Frank, I think she's asking about her friend," the man with the flashlight told the other man.

Both men looked down at their feet sadly. "Sweetheart, I think that girl in the passenger seat might not make it. She didn't-" Frank began.

"They'll try their best to save her," the flashlight man interrupted, a faint smile appearing on his face.

Daisy couldn't breathe. She was suffocating in her own fear. It wasn't just her chest, but her heart. Jemma might be gone. Gone. GONE. And she never got the chance to confess her love.

Eventually Daisy's eyes drifted closed from sheer exhaustion and pain, but she started to awake a little as she heard the sirens. She just wanted to get up and save Jemma...

"How is she?" came a muffled female voice. It was unfamiliar, but calming.

"I don't know. She's worried about the other girl who was in the crash."

"We'll take care of her. Thank you for staying with her, sir."

"Of course. I'm so sorry," Frank whispered to Daisy one last time before leaving to speak with the police.

Daisy opened her eyes to see the woman inspecting her to see what was wrong.

"Chest," Daisy croaked. "Breathe..."

"Okay, okay, ma'am, I've got you," the woman, a paramedic, told her. "What's your name?"

"Dais...y," she mumbled.

"Alright, Daisy, we're going to take great care of you, okay?" the woman paramedic assured. Daisy felt herself being lifted onto something soft and the something being lifted a few feet up and clicking into place. She wasn't thinking too clearly, but if she had to guess, she was on a stretcher. Daisy remembered going on one when she was ten. She was fine, but she'd gotten into a bike crash and hit her head on the pavement and got a minor concussion. She remembered being pampered by her foster family when she got home from the hospital. She loved the attention, and secretly wished she could go in ambulances more often. Now that this was happening, she didn't wish that anymore.

A few minutes passed as Daisy felt bright lights, making her squint her already-closed eyes. She felt the woman's gentle touch, trying to find out what was wrong with her. "I'm sorry, Daisy, but this is going to hurt." Daisy winced as she felt a very sharp, stabbing pain in her side near her ribs. After she got over the pain, though, she realized that she chest loosened and she was able to breathe better.

"The seal that helps your lungs breathe for you was broken when your broken rib penetrated it," the paramedic explained. Daisy opened her eyes a sliver and saw two paramedics in the back of the ambulance with her. One man was next to her, inserting an IV, she guessed, and the other one was the woman who was now fiddling with some sort of needle-straw stuck in her side. Daisy was a little freaked out, but knew from experience in the field that they were only helping her.

Jemma. Oh my God.

"Jemma?" she whispered, her chest still hurting.

The woman opened her mouth to speak, but stopped herself. She sighed. "Your friend is in the ambulance in front of us."

"Is she...okay..." Daisy mumbled, her breathing hitching as she closed her eyes at the sharp, deep pain in her leg.

"We...don't know," the man to her right told her. Daisy felt tears well up in her eyes.

"Oh, my God..."

"Hey," the woman said to her, stroking her arm. "Everything is gonna be okay."

She really didn't know that, did she?

* * *

At some point, Daisy passed out again. She wasn't sure if the paramedics drugged her or if she just fell asleep naturally, but nonetheless, she drifted away at some point. When she awoke, the first thing she noticed was the bright, fluorescent lights glaring in her face. Groaning as it worsened her headache, Daisy screwed her eyes closed and reached down to grab the edge of the sheets that covered her, yanking them up over her head. Satisfied, she relaxed her sore body and fell back into slumber.

The next time Daisy awoke it was Melinda May by her side. The woman was on the edge of her seat, her hand behind Daisy's head, stroking it. When she saw the girl awakening, she ripped her hand away and leaned back, straightening herself up as if she hadn't wanted Daisy to see her showing her affection.

"You're awake," she said, a small, May-like smile appearing on her lips.

Daisy didn't bother to return the smile. She didn't even notice that she was in a hospital room. "Where is Jemma?" she asked quickly.

May bit her lip. "She's-"

"She's what?" Daisy winced at the pang in her ribs.

"They're making her comfortable."

Daisy paled. She silently cursed herself for ever having hope that this would turn out any better than what was happening now.

"She's going to die," Daisy stated. It wasn't a question. "That's- That's what they say when people are dying."

May looked down at her feet. It wasn't often that the woman showed her emotions, but this was an exception. Daisy could see the tears trickling down May's face onto her lap.

"I'm so sorry," Daisy mumbled, tearing the sheets off herself. She scrunched her face up upon seeing the gown she was wearing but brushed it off, trying to stand from the bed.

"Don't you dare," May said. Daisy didn't know when she'd gotten there, but the older woman was now by her side, nudging her back onto the hospital bed. "You have a badly broken rib, a fractured tibia, concussion, and multiple deep cuts on your face, hands, and chest. You are lying down." She gently pushed Daisy's legs onto the mattress and pulled the sheets back over the green cast on her right leg and her bare left leg, tucking the blanket right below her neck and cupping her check. "I am so thankful that you're okay. Right now, that's what matters."

Daisy started to feel emotional. The glass door of numbness broke and the tears started to pour. She sobbed as May pulled her into a gentle embrace, shushing her and stroking her hair. "But..." the girl sobbed. "I would rather die than live without Jemma."

"You're going to have to get past that, Daisy. I know it sucks, it's a horrible thing to have to live with, but you're going to have to. We are all here for you along the way."

"But Jemma isn't..." Daisy wailed, breathing into May's shirt.

"I know, Daisy," May whispered, her voice breaking as well. "I know."

Daisy could barely see Jemma through the blurry tears that filled her eyes. She sat in a wheelchair, staring at the girl she loved. Tubes and wires and monitors covered her entire body, beeping as it alerted everyone that she was still physically alive. Her face was still ever so beautiful; it was clear to Daisy now: she _loved_ Jemma Simmons.

And now Jemma Simmons was gone.

"Her parents are on the way," Fitz told her from the corner of Jemma's room. His voice sounded sad, hurt, and somewhat numb. He wasn't one to show his emotions often, as were most SHIELD agents, but Daisy knew that as soon as he got the chance to be alone with his wife, he'd sob his heart out. He loved her more than he loved anyone else.

What he didn't know is that he wasn't the only one.

* * *

By the time it was mid-day, Daisy was tired of her colleagues pitying her. Elena, Mack, Coulson...They always walked into her room, handed her flowers or candy or cards, and then stood there pitying her. She hated the looks they all gave her. She knew they were all well-meaning, but she hated them nonetheless. _She_ wasn't the one on life support. She was just the unlucky one who ended up surviving.

"Daisy," Coulson whispered to her softly as he quietly entered her hospital room. She was turned toward the blank wall, staring at the elf and reindeer cutouts and tinsel taped to it. Phil eyed her untouched food tray and sighed. "Daisy, honey, you have to eat. It'll help you heal."

"Do you think I give two craps about healing right now?" she muttered quietly, but harshly. She regretted being so rude to him; after all, he was losing Jemma too.

He sighed again, patting her uninjured foot through the covers. "I'm so sorry, Dais. If I could take this all back I would."

"But you can't." She turned onto her back, biting her lip at the pain. She squinted at him. "It's _my_ fault."

He shook his head and huffed. "That's not true, and you know it." Deep inside him, he knew she didn't know that. He knew she'd forever blame herself.

"No, because it _is_ my fault." She stared off into the distance, letting herself drift off, back into that darkness she'd spent such a long time climbing out of after Lincoln's death. The darkness of grief. Of depression. Of deep remorse, self-hate, and guilt. "I was the one driving. I should have been more careful. And now she's dead." What she really wanted to say was, _And I'll never get to confess my love for her._

Coulson sighed, knitting his eyebrows and taking Daisy's bandaged hand in his. He patted it a few times, trying his best to show her some affection. He hated to see her like this. None of the other agents noticed, but he knew she was going back to her dark place. He'd seen her in it after the Hive and Lincoln's death and it killed him to see her drifting back.

Wanting to give her some space, he gave her hand one last pat before standing up, straightening out the wrinkles on his sweater and exiting the hospital room.

* * *

That night as she closed her eyes in the hospital bed, Daisy couldn't stop seeing Jemma. Jemma in the car. The last time she looked at her. The love she felt...

And now it was all gone.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daisy heads to William May's house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter for you all! Please enjoy :) Keep in mind that this story is somewhere after season five, most likely in season six after Fitz was found (and we're going to pretend Coulson never died).

Daisy was silent as May drove her home. Fitz and Jemma's parents were still at the hospital, preparing to take Simmons off life support for good. No one had asked Daisy what she thought. Everyone seemed to simultaneously forget about Daisy and not leave her alone. Was that even possible? She didn't know.

The doctors wanted to keep Daisy longer for physical therapy but May saw the look in her surrogate daughter's eyes and knew she needed to get away from the hospital, away from the place where Jemma was about to die.

Well, she was already gone.

Sighing, Daisy watched her breath fog up the window. The small layer of snow on the ground made her heart ache. If it weren't for the snow, Jemma would still be alive.

Last night as she lie in bed, Daisy ran through every single event that led to the crash. If she hadn't made Jemma stay with her at the base, they wouldn't have gotten caught in the snow on the way to Arizona. If she had been paying more attention, she would've noticed the ice and gotten out of the way.

But beyond all the guilt, Daisy felt empty. Through these past years after Lincoln died, she'd never admitted it before, but Jemma was the reason she was pulling through. The slight possibility of them falling in love was her incentive for getting up every morning. And if not romantic, then she already had a beautiful friendship with her. Sure, it was strained when Fitz and The Doctor traumatized Daisy, but they got over their differences eventually. Daisy just loved Jemma too much.

Jemma had filled most of Daisy's heart, and now that she was gone, Daisy didn't know what to do with herself. She knew she would always have a place for her in her heart, but...how big did it need to be? Lincoln's, Trip's, her mother's death had taught her to move on quickly. Grief didn't usually do her any good, or so she thought. Her friends knew better, but Daisy took comfort in self-hate and blame. It wasn't anywhere close to healthy, but she was so stubborn no one but Jemma could get her out of the cycle.

May pulled into her dad's driveway. She put the car into park and turned it off, opening her driver door and walking to the backseat to help Daisy out. She lifted her crutches from the trunk and handed them to her, helping the girl onto her good foot and staying by her side as she led her inside. "William put salt on the sidewalk so you wouldn't slip," May told her. Daisy responded with a small nod.

May took the keys out of her pocket and unlocked the door. A lean old man was inside, and he stood from his easy chair, putting on his glasses and squinting.

"Hello, daughter. Is this Daisy?" he asked, nearly emotionless. Daisy could tell he had some pity; everyone did around her.

May nodded, gently rubbing Daisy's back. The girl was staring down at the floor; she couldn't bear to look at May's dad. Melinda and William exchanged glances as if to communicate something.

"Come, dear, let me show you your room," he said, gesturing down a hallway. May handed Daisy off to him and William gently guided Daisy to a room, her crutches making loud creaks on the wood floors. He opened the door for her, revealing a small, plain room with a double bed, a small dresser, and a twin blowup mattress in the corner. "You can take the bed. Your friend and her husband were going to share it, but I suspect he is leaving even sooner than the rest of you."

"Thank you," Daisy whispered to him, her heart aching again at the vague mention of Jemma. She made her way into the room and he shut the door for her out of courtesy. Sitting down on the bed, Daisy winced from the ache in her broken rib. But who was she to complain? Jemma was the one who died.

She must have been sitting there for hours. Maybe even days, Daisy didn't know. All she knew was that she should've been the one to die. Jemma had a future. With Fitz. She was going to start a family, and she...Daisy was the middle man. Deep inside her, she wanted to ruin Fitz and Simmons's relationship, and now she had gone and done it.

A loud yell and a crash rang out and Daisy jumped a bit, afraid that William had been found by one of SHIELD's enemies or the like. It took her a minute to realize it was her own doing. She had thrown her crutches across the room, running into the dresser and knocking over the candle, shattering the glass container around it. Tears were trickling down her cheeks as she sobbed, so frustrated she couldn't think straight. _She_ ruined this. _She_ did this. _She_ killed Jemma.

The guest room door flung open and Mack and Elena rushed in, concerned looks across both of their faces. Upon seeing Daisy crying, they eyed each other before gently sitting down on the bed on either side of her, Elena putting her arm gently around Daisy's shoulder and caressing her arm. Mack looked down at his feet. He hated when Daisy was like this after Lincoln and he hated it just as much now.

After a solid five minutes of silence, excluding Daisy's hiccups and cries, she spoke: "Is everyone okay?"

Elena pulled her arm away from Daisy, yanking her sleeves down and crossing her arms over her chest. "Jemma's parents and Fitz are staying in a hotel and they're heading to England tomorrow morning for Jemma's funeral. Coulson is on his way back to the Lighthouse to deal with the paperwork and you, me, Mack, and May are going to go back tomorrow after dinner so we can get you started on PT soon."

"I don't care about healing."

"Daisy- " Mack began.

She raised a hand, her eyes still on the carpeting on the floor. "No, hear me out. I don't want to be an agent anymore."

"Daisy, we need you," Elena said. "You're our- "

"You're a strong Inhuman, too, Yo-Yo," Daisy said, sighing and shifting her weight. "You all can survive without me."

"Daisy, you can't do this to us again," Mack said, taking her hand and looking into her eyes. Daisy's eyes shot over to his for a split-second before resorting back to the floor.

"I don't care."

"Daisy," came a voice from the doorway. Daisy looked up to see Melinda, a battered-up duffle bag in one hand and a steaming cup of tea in the other. Mack and Elena took the opportunity to leave the room.

Daisy felt the mattress dip slightly as May dropped the duffle bag onto the end of the bed. She set the cup of tea on the dresser, bending down to gather up the glass pieces from the broken candle and leaving for a moment to throw them away. When she came back, Daisy hadn't moved.

"You're always going to come back to us, you know," Melinda said, pulling the bedsheets down and fluffing the pillows. She set the duffle bag on the floor.

Daisy scowled and looked at her surrogate mother. "Just because I did before doesn't mean I am going to again."

May raised her eyebrows and shrugged. "We're all you have, Daisy."

Daisy shrugged and crossed her arms as May patted the mattress for Daisy to get into bed. Sighing, she scooted over and slid under the blanket, letting May pull it over her. The older woman walked over to the dresser and grabbed the teacup, bringing it to Daisy then picking up her crutches and setting them neatly in her reach.

"I want you to rest."

"It's like the afternoon..."

May looked at her watch. "It's midnight."

Daisy swallowed. "Oh."

May sighed, patting Daisy's good leg through the blanket. "Drink that tea and get some sleep. Tomorrow we'll be going home."

Daisy let out a deep sigh before taking a sip of the warm tea. It felt good in her stomach, something other than gross hospital Jell-O. Melinda left the room and gently shut the door behind her. An hour later, when Daisy's eyes were closed, she heard May walk in and climb into the sheets on the air mattress in the corner. She felt childish, but Daisy had to admit to herself that she felt comforted knowing May was right there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter was sort of short, I had a long day of online school and I'm a bit tired. I'll try to update sometime this weekend!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daisy and Fitz finally meet for the first time since Jemma's death. It doesn't exactly go well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, another chapter for you! Sorry for not getting this to you last weekend. My Christmas break starts in a week so I should be updating more often after that!
> 
> DISCLAIMER: I don't want you all to blame Fitz for what he does to Daisy in this chapter. He's obviously grieving and his emotions aren't stable, plus it was all an accident on his part.
> 
> Anyway, please enjoy:

Daisy wasn't happy being back in the Lighthouse. When Elena walked her by the lab, she nearly started sobbing. Jemma's desk was there...her computer, the Santa hat she hung on the corner of her chair...Jemma was gone. A tiny tear escaped Daisy's eye.

Yo-Yo opened the door to Daisy's bunk for her and nodded once she was seated on her bed. "If I can get you anything, just shoot me a text," Elena told her. She froze. Daisy's phone had shattered in the crash. "Er, um, I'm sure someone will come around to bring you a new phone."

Daisy gave no response, so the other Inhuman sighed and shut the door, closing her eyes and shaking her head once she was out in the hallway. As the tears started to flow out of her eyes, Elena felt big arms enveloping her into a hug. She and Mack stood there a while before going back to their bunk.

Daisy sighed, lying back on her bed. She was tired from the road trip and found herself drifting off before she even had a chance to change her clothes.

When she awoke, Daisy yawned, squinting and checking the time on her alarm clock. 5:00 AM, it said. She sighed, leaning over to grab her crutches off the floor and tucking them under her arms, putting her weight on them and standing up. She made her way to her own bathroom and tried her best to get clean. She knew she couldn't shower until they removed the initial cast, so she just grabbed a warm washcloth and did what she could. When she was done, she changed into sweats and sat down on her mini couch, turning on her little TV and watching a random sitcom.

Half an hour or so later, she heard someone knocking at her door. "Come in," she said quietly, hoping this person could hear her. She looked up to see May and her expression softened a bit. Daisy muted the TV as May sat down next to her on the couch.

"How you doing?" May asked her, gently drawing circles on her bandaged hand.

"I'm alive," Daisy responded, taking her eyes off May and back to the silent TV.

May bit her cheek, eyeing the footstool and pillow Daisy was using to prop up her leg. "I wish you would eat something."

"Not hungry," she mumbled.

May sighed and clenched her teeth. "Don't do this."

Daisy squinted and made eye contact with May again. "Do _what_?"

May shook her head, pursing her lips and crossing her arms over her chest. "This is exactly what you did after Lincoln died."

A pang in Daisy's chest. "This is different," she whispered, barely audible.

"Different, how?"

"I loved Lincoln, but he was just a distraction."

"A dist- "

"May," Daisy said, the loudest she'd spoken since the accident. The women made intense eye contact. "May, I need to tell you something, and you _cannot_ tell _anyone_ else."

Daisy wasn't sure why she wanted to confess; all she knew was that she needed to get it off her chest. She trusted Melinda the most out of anyone on this base.

"I loved Jemma. And...and not like a friend. Like, I _love_ loved her...she was my soulmate, May, I..."

There it went. Her life's biggest secret was now revealed to another human being.

"Daisy, I know."

"You...you _what_..?" Daisy's eyes widened.

May chuckled, motioning for Daisy to come closer. The girl complied, moving her legs gently onto the couch and scooting to lay her head in May's arms. Melinda stroked her hair. "You think it wasn't obvious?"

"May, what's obvious for you is highly encrypted coding for everyone else."

May raised her eyebrows and shrugged. "Fair, but I knew, Daisy, I did. The way you looked at her screamed love and pain at the same time. I hated seeing you like that, when I knew you yearned for the impossible. I can't imagine what you're going through now that she's dead, but Daisy, it isn't your fault. I'm here for you and I always will be."

May's shirt sleeve was wet with Daisy's tears. She felt the girl's cries against her chest and just hushed her, continuing to stroke her head.

After a solid hour of this, May spoke: "So, you still gonna leave SHIELD?"

"Only if you come with me."

May laughed. "I'll take that as a no."

* * *

That day, Daisy hated her physical therapy session. The man helping her, Dr. Jacobson, was one of Jemma's old colleagues, and he made the whole session all about Jemma. He was way too rough with her leg exercises, and kept yelling at her when she said she couldn't do it. He brought her to tears more than once. Daisy wondered if the man had any empathy. He made her miss Jemma even more. Jemma would have been so gentle with her injuries.

Daisy felt pretty weak as she crutch-walked her way back to her bunk. Her leg and chest were aching and she hadn't eaten in days. She was glad she was able to open the bunk door, but collapsed onto her bed once inside. She sobbed for a while, but once all the tears were gone, she made her way back to the couch with her new phone and laid there surfing the internet for hours. At some point, Coulson came in with a tray of lunch for her, but she ignored his presence.

* * *

It had been a week since Daisy was back home at the Lighthouse. Every day was pretty much the same thing: wake up, surf the web, go to PT, eat a granola bar, surf the web some more, and sleep. She got her cast off on the fifth day and it was replaced with a black boot that went up to her knee.

Fitz got home the seventh evening and Daisy wasn't the least bit excited to see him again, especially considering she now knew that May was aware of her love for Jemma. It was certainly going to be awkward being in the presence of him from now on. May said he refused to take a break from working, that he needed something to do to take his mind off of his late wife.

She wanted to avoid Fitz but May forced Daisy to say hi. Leaning heavily on her crutches and hunching her back, Daisy nodded at Fitz, who silently acknowledged each of the agents lining up in the control room to welcome him home. When he got to her, Daisy could've sworn she saw him squint at her in anger before turning away and leaving.

* * *

The next morning, Daisy was sitting at the common room counter, sipping coffee and working on her laptop. Her leg was propped up on a second stool and for a while there she felt genuinely distracted from all that had happened. That changed when Fitz walked in.

"I see you're having your sweet time," Fitz muttered as he rinsed his mug in the sink.

Daisy looked up from her laptop, scowling. "Uh, yeah." She shook her head, going back to working and trying to ignore him.

"Must be nice to be able to work again," he said a moment later. He almost made Daisy jump because he was right behind her shoulder, looking at her screen.

Daisy didn't know why he was acting so weird, but she had a feeling it had something to do with Jemma. "Yup," she mumbled in response, heaving a sigh of relief when he finally left.

At PT that day, Jacobson was being at least somewhat kind and encouraging. He just had her bend and straighten her knee but he helped her along the way.

"Great job today," he said to her as he helped her put her cast back on. Daisy nodded and thanked him, getting up on her crutches and standing. "I'd better head out," he told her, looking down at his pager and heading away.

"Have a good day," she said to him as she started out of the lab. She stopped when Fitz walked in, looking down at his laptop. He bumped into Daisy, the coffee cup in his hand spilling all over her grey hoodie. She grunted, the heat shocking her healing rib and cut skin.

Fitz pursed his lip and walked off, but not before inspecting his own laptop for damage.

Daisy gasped for air. She narrowed her eyes and turned around to face Fitz. "You're really just gonna walk off without an apology?"

Fitz crossed his arms over his chest. "I don't need to apologize for an accident. Isn't that _your_ logic, hm? You know, after you killed my wife?"

" _Fitz_ ," Daisy warned, her throat tightening and tears already welling up.

"Just _admit_ it, Daisy! _You_ are responsible for Jemma's death. Had you been more careful, she would be _alive_ right now!" He stepped closer to her, his jaw clenched. Daisy was trembling, the tears spilling down her cheeks. "You prevented us from starting a family," he said quietly. His voice cracked.

Daisy began to sob. She couldn't handle it any longer. She had pushed away the guilt for this long but now Fitz was bringing it all back.

"YOU DON'T GET TO BE THE EMOTIONAL ONE HERE!" Fitz screamed.

"WHY NOT?!" Daisy shouted at him, nearly spitting on his face. "I LOST MY BEST FRIEND!"

"I LOST MY _WIFE_. MY SOULMATE!"

Heavy breathing was the only noise between the two of them for a solid few minutes.

"You're not the only one who loved her," Daisy huffed.

Fitz slowly narrowed his eyes, his friend's words sinking in. "You did not just..."

"I loved her, okay?! And quite frankly, I'm just as sad as you that she died. She never knew that I loved her back. _Never_. You two were meant to be; I guess I'm just the sad bisexual dealing with the unrequited love of a dead woman."

Fitz furrowed his brow in anger, his hand beginning to shake. Daisy knew he was about to explode and she started to worry that his Doctor side was going to come back.

"You. Did not just. Say that," he said slowly, stepping even closer to her. "YOU- FOR HOW LONG?!"

She pursed her lips, getting so close to Fitz's face their noses were practically touching. "Since the day I met her."

"You've gone too far," he muttered, stepping back and shaking his head. He buried his face in his hands. Daisy didn't know what to do. She contemplated running off, but for one she was so slow with her crutches and for two she was intrigued to see what he was going to do.

May stepped into the room at that moment and her eyes widened. Daisy shot her a look and shook her head, signaling that this was a bad time. May stayed anyway.

"What's going on?" she asked the two younger adults.

"Six years," Fitz mumbled through his hands.

"Fitz, what did you say?" May asked gently, trying not to press.

"She loved her for longer than I did..." Fitz ripped his head out of his hands, his face red and raw with pure anger and grief. He had been cooping up his emotions for so long and was finally letting them out - albeit in poor circumstances. "SHE LOVED MY WIFE FOR _SIX YEARS_!" he screamed, no longer speaking to anyone but himself. He couldn't control himself as he grabbed Daisy's arm, yanking it and causing her to cry out in pain. Daisy grabbed for her healing rib and ended up dropping both crutches in the process. Unable to keep her balance, she fell to the floor, luckily landing on her backside and not her injured leg.

"FITZ!" May yelled in a scolding manner, rushing to Daisy's side and crouching down, putting an arm around her to support her sore torso.

Fitz was trembling with remorse. His teeth chattered and his eyes were wide, like he'd just seen a ghost. He rushed out of the lab.

May directed her attention back to Daisy. She was sobbing on the floor, her arm gripping her ribcage. Coffee stains covered her clothing and her face was raw with tears.

"Daisy," she whispered with pity. She pulled her into a gentle embrace, stroking her back and just letting her sob into her shoulder. "Come on, let's go get you cleaned up."

When May looked up, Mack was standing in the entrance of the lab. "I got your page," he said.

May nodded somberly, motioning for him to come towards her. She helped him lift Daisy into his arms and they brought her back to her bunk. Daisy was trembling and shaking on her bed, tears continuing to pour out of her eyes.

"I'll take it from here," May whispered to Mack. She could see the sadness and pity laced into his expression.

"Take good care of her," he told her quietly before leaving the room, shutting the door behind him.

"Daisy, honey," May said gently as she moved the messy hair out of Daisy's face.

"I killed her," she mumbled. She swallowed, opening her eyes and looking up at May. "I killed Jemma."

"No, you didn't," May assured, already working at gently removing her stained hoodie. Daisy hissed at the pain, but May managed to get it off. "How is your rib feeling?"

"It hurts," she whispered, her voice cracking.

"I'll get you some ice in a bit. What can I do for you, hon? Do you want some food? Tea? A shower?"

Daisy shook her head. "Sleep."

May sighed, stroking her hair. "Alright," she whispered. She pulled the covers up over Daisy's body and kissed her on the forehead. She turned the bunk light off and sighed once more, getting one last look at Daisy before shutting the door behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's all for now, folks! I hope I didn't hurt you too bad :( Please review/comment with any suggestions!

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, I'm so sorry. I feel like I could continue this story if you all wanted me to so let me know in the reviews/comments.


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